Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Happy Halloween!

Have a safe and happy Halloween everyone!

Thursday, October 26, 2006

The Breeders-An Update

Seems my neighbors need just a weeeeee bit more over exposure, as if have the police at their house at all hours of the day and night wasn't enough.

Today, for all the world to witness, they drug their shit out for the national viewing audience's pleasure. They went on the Dr. Phil Show. www.drphil.com (click on Thursday's show for full details).

Luckily, I wasn't home to witness the train wreck but as soon as I pulled into the drive my home phone went nuts! Most of my neighbors are stay at home moms and they happened to catch the show. It's truly the talk of the street this evening.

All I have to ask is, "Stacy, pumpkin, why?" Why would you want to drag your shit out on national television for public consumption? You say this whole fiasco has soured your name, embarrassed you, ruined your career etc. etc. And by going on national television rehashing it, does what exactly? Good move, toots.

Notice her looser husband, Eddie, wasn't there. Figures. I doubt him to be a pedophile, but I know for sure he's a looser. A looser she needs to stop having babies with! Lets hope Dr. Phil makes good on his promise to do a lie detector test, for THAT, I'll tune in.

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

Just For Shits and Giggles

The internet is a wonderful thing my friends. You can find your true love, diagnose your tumor, take college classes and find a long lost friend. The internet is a modern day marvel, God bless the little fuckin' time waster.

Can't say I've gotten into the whole My Space thing. I don't see the allure. I guess I'm too old to get it. I'm sure there'll be other internet fads I don't get, I'm ok with that. The one fad I get a kick out of is www.youtube.com. Hilarious stuff people! If you haven't seen some of the homemade skits, I encourage you to go on over and get a belly laugh or 3. Good stuff right there.
Now comes the sharing part, I swear I laugh my ass off every time I see this skit. It just goes to show you I'm a 10 year old boy trapped in a 36 year old woman's body!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xItR-nh9cYM

I had weigh in last night. Down another 5.2lbs for a total of 77.4 lbs. since February 15th. I've lost well over 30% of my original weight. Setting each goal in 10% increments helps me a lot. Instead of seeing the large number of pounds I needed to loose, I see a smaller goal, a more manageable number I can shoot for. Yep, seeing the light at the end of the tunnel now. I really need to decide on a final goal weight.

Sunday, October 22, 2006

Gratitudes


Coming to a mailbox near you! I'm done with my Halloween cards. My original plan didn't pan out, it never does, yet I remain optimistic each time I sit at my desk to create. One day I'll learn. On the inside the words Hocus Pocus are stamped and a border of those same cats are at the bottom. Eh, not my best work but it'll do. I'm too busy thinking about Christmas right now. I can't cop out and use the photo Christmas card again this year, can I?

I can't say enough thank yous to the people that called and emailed me. Thanks guys! I do appreciate it.

I'm feeling better. I'm up, dressed, showered and tackling a never ending to do list. I'm pretty dern proud of myself for not giving into wanting to lay in bed and feel sorry for myself. I guess I'm learning from past behaviors, and this my friends is a GOOD thing.

Speaking of GOOD THINGS, I need to list a few, you know, just so I can see in print how very blessed I really am.

1.) Friends, both in real life and those online. Even better, friends that make you laugh!
2.) Leftover creative energy from last weekend.
3.) Scrapbook stores that have the latest and greatest and you're there when they are unpacking it! Scored me so loverly goodies and used a $25 store credit to boot!
4.) Online shopping in the form of more scrap goodies! (here, mailman, mailman)
5.) A hardworking husband that's concerned about me and prays for my wellness.
6.) Helping a friend that is in need.
7.) Putting on your sweats on from last winter and finding they swamp you. Yet, more shopping ensues.
8.) Having health insurance x2.
9.) Cool weather, snuggle weather.
10.) A shrinking to do list.

Life is good.

Thursday, October 19, 2006

Weird Spot

I'm just in a weird place right now and it's hard to explain. I know I've been dealing with depression most, if not all my life. I vividly remember at 16 waking up in the middle of the night, Mom was still up, going to her and telling her that something was wrong with me. I couldn't put it into words then either. I remember begging her to help me, fix me, make me right. She dismissed me and told me there was nothing wrong with me. She was my Mom, she was right and I went to bed, never to be helped.

It took a total break down to realize she was wrong. So very wrong. I wish I could put words to my feelings right now but I can't. I'm just blue, very blue and I'm not sure how to fix me. I usually take a few weeks and snap out of it but I have a feeling that this time, that won't be the case. The husband is very worried, he's seen me like this before and he's totally ill equipped to help. So, he does what a good husband does and stands beside me, gives me pep talks and cheers me on. Some days I like it, most I don't. I know he's just trying to help.

I've been in therapy on and off for about 10 years. I get to a point where I think what demons I'm battling are gone only to have them surface again in some other form. I think it's time to talk to someone again. I'm beyond helping myself and I'm beyond pep talks. I need to know what is causing this depressive episode so I can deal with it if it comes back in the future. I'm trying to be proactive even though the only thing I want to do is crawl into bed and forget about the world.

I'm ok with whatever my therapist has in mind. I've been taking an anti-depressant for 10 years, sometimes in large doses sometimes in small. I'm ok with whatever she has in mind as long as I'm not some drooling zombie who's numb to the world. I need to be aware, alert, so I can work on this problem with her. But right now, I need to talk to someone, someone who can help.

Monday, October 16, 2006

Friends



Saturday was my actual birthday, but being the brat-only child-that I am, I stretched it out all week. Friday I met some girlfriends in Fredricksburg for a scrapbooking weekend retreat. It was so wonderful to not worry about work or anything else for that matter. We laughed till we cried and almost tinkled in our panties, we ate so much wonderful food but most of all we reconnected as friends. Friends I miss a lot when I don't get to spend time or talk with them. It's maddening how we can let life get in the way of our friendships. We say we'll call them tomorrow and never do or we'll get together but schedules never jive. This weekend made me realize what truly fun, inspiring, helpful, loving and considerate friends I have. Friends I know I'll have a lifetime.

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Evil Cake

All of my girlfriends and I got together last night for a pre-birthday dinner, cake included. Yes I'm milking my birthday week, so what. It'd been since August that I was able to get together with all of my best girlfriends (at the same place and time). We had the best time! Pictures forthcoming, I promise.

My friend Yvette is the baker from hell. If you need a 6 ft. long cake in the shape of a snake for a Fear Factor birthday, she can do it. I've seen it, it can be done and delivered in one piece. Bottom line, she rocks as a baker! Last night, she made me the most heavenly, divine, borderline orgasmic carrot cake with orange cream cheese icing that was so good it'd make you wanna slap your granny. People, I'm not a sweets person. I'll pass up candy for a tortilla, I'm all about the carbs! So, for me to rave about this cake, yeah, it was awesome. I had a few forkfuls for breakfast. That divine.

I haven't updated you on my weight loss progress in a while, so here goes. As of last night I've lost a few tenths shy of 74 lbs and I'm starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel. That's almost 30% of my original weight! Give or take, I'm half way to my goal. I haven't set a hard and fast number yet. What the charts say for my height seems very skinny to me and I'm not sure if I can pull it off with my larger bone structure. I don't want to look emaciated. So, I'm back and forth on my goal weight. Right now I'm looking at and happy with what I have done. I have literally nothing in my closet that fits. Luckily a nice girl at my Weight Watchers meeting had mercy on me and gave me some beautiful hand-me-downs that fit perfect. I paid it forward and gave some of my clothes away that were too large for me and just sitting in my closet. I'm taking all of my nice and expensive suits to the women's shelter. I know those ladies need clothes for job interviews and court so I know those items will go to good use.

When I started my new job I'd lost around 40lbs. One of my female coworkers noticed the other day that I'd lost some more weight and she asked me what I'd been doing. I told her, "I quit putting shit in my mouth." We both laughed and then I told her, "Really, Weight Watchers and it's such a do-able program." I think I talked her into joining.

I'm starting to run into people that I see only every once in a while. They tell me I look fantastic but don't mention the weight loss specifically. I'm starting to wonder if they think I've had gastric bypass or I have some deadly illness. I really want to tell them, "No, no magic pill, no surgery and I'm not sick, I'm just eating right and getting in lots of activity." With gastric bypass being so hip to do these days I really want people to know I'm doing it the ol' fashioned way, with hard work, portion control, lots of healthy food and exercise. I know that's weird, but for some reason I feel, for me, gastric bypass is a cop out. I know for some, it's the only solution but I know many people that did it because they were lazy and wanted a fast solution. No thanks, God put my plumbing in a certain way and it's staying like that, I'm just going to quit putting shit in my mouth.

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

It's Fall!!




No denying it, this is my absolute favorite time of year. I can't wait to go hike Lost Maples in a few weeks and head to a pumpkin patch to get some pictures of the dogs frolicking in the cool air. I adore this time of year, not to mention it's my birth month. So in honor of fall, I'm going to share my fall decorations. I have a lot and I use them all in all their tacky goodness.